10 Wonderful Years

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments, love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove.

-- William Shakespeare

This month, on the 29th, my wife and I will have been married 10 years. I know! 10 years! (Happy anniversary, kulta!)

And after 10 years I still love my wife.

Let me clarify that statement. When I say that I love my wife, I don't mean I'm "in love" with her, I mean that I really do love her. I see a distinct difference between loving someone and being "in love" with someone. The ephemeral versus the eternal. The ubiquitous versus the extraordinary. Romantic versus rational.

But I digress.

Eveliina and I have known each other for 16 years and been a couple for 13 or so. But the "I do's" were bespoken 10 years ago in a quaint, wooden church built in 1763-1764 alongside a lake in Petajavesi, Finland.

I really do love this woman. And I love being married to her. (And in a culture which is openly hostile to marriage as a lifelong commitment that is an increasingly unusual thing.) I'm not asserting it is easy being married - there are no comprehensive set of rules, no manual to cover every situation, no way for both my wife and me to be happy with each other all the time - but it is a blessing and a gift which has made my life so rich and fulfilling that it is worth the effort, worth the sweat and tears, worth the commitment.

Our relationship started out like most do. I still remember the first time I met my wife. When I first saw her I thought to myself, "Wow!" And from then on I went out of my way to pay attention to her, and actively sought to meet her needs. I'm not saying my stunning good looks and modesty didn't have something to do with her attraction to me, but I expressed an interest in her, and she noticed that.

Years later, the very method I employed to get her to choose me over all the men in the world - and there were lots of them vying for her attention - is the tactic I use to keep her choosing me. (Shhh! Dont tell her!) Back then I showered her with attention, I let her know I adored her, and I showed her in many different ways that she is important; I try and do the same today. It seems to work.

Together forever is a wonderful dream. And although passion is not like crazy glue and the marriage ceremony doesn't guarantee anything, a healthy, happy marriage is worth the work. I hit the jackpot.

Thank you, Eveliina, for 10 wonderful years. Here's to 100 more!

Rakastan sua. Te amo. Te quiero. Te adoro. Te deseo. Me antojs...

Paul-Baptiste